Interesting...

Strange dreams of you it seems
Leaves me finding beauty in the smallest of things...


And old friend called and asked if he could see me, if only even breifly. I agreed and was pleasantly surprised. Very.

Drunken But Not Stirred...

Living in New York often leaves my days feeling like hours instead. So much has happened since the last time I've blogged. Let's see. I went to the DJ Premier/Pete Rock/9th Wonder Smironoff Party that was hosted by Ed Lover. You know, he's once funny dude and down to earth too. That's always a good thing since most cats in the industry be on some other shit half the time. It was pretty much an old school hip hop party and lots of cats stopped by to partake. Q-tip dj'ed for a while, Pharomonch stopped by. As did Talib Kweli and Sadat X...at least I think that was him. It was also Pete Rock's birthday so they came out with the cake and all that shit...everybody sang happy birthday. It was cool. You know its so cool having friends in the industry. Thanks to J, not only was it an open bar but he hooked a sista up with a VIP band and everything. That's my dude he always looking out for ya girl and I really appreciate that shit. Me and Jay go waaaay back and he's one of the few friends that have managed to stick around through all the time that has passed. Speaking of freinds from the past. That very same night I ran into Donwizzle. You know he's doing his thing with the group Tanya Morgan (http://www.tanya.com/) and I'm really proud of him. Shit, it ain't easy living in the city and doing that music thing. You gotta have some serious hustle game and a lot of stamina. Shout out to Don! You can imagine how that night ended with free booze, good
music and good friends....Drunk Ass Hell. I like nights like this... Anyway that was Thursday night. I relaxed and got some rest on Friday. For some reason I'm never excited about doing anything on Fridays. I think the by that point my work week has completely worn me down and by that time i'm not good for much more than SCB's and sleeping. And that's exactly what i did.

On Saturday I went to a bar-b-que in brooklyn at Gary, Terrence, and Danny's. Those three are so much fun to be around and they have the most awesome brownstone. It's huge and walking around it feels very industrial since they're all involved in some kind of artistic creation. You'd have to be to think of having a pinata at a backyard bar-b-que. And when I tell you watching a bunch of drunk people swing blindly and wildly at a dangling money is extremely entertaining, please believe me. That shit was hilarious. They was hitting everything but the damn monkey at first...the window, people standing near by, tables and shit. Pure comedy. Of course there was plenty of drinking and lots of food. Though they did run out

of hot dog buns at one point and we started

eating them with hamburger buns and/or pita bread. Was still good non the less. Saw some old friends and met with some completely new ones. The very cool thing about parties they throw is that they have the most interesting bunch of friends...granted they're pretty unique themselves but you get my drift. I stayed much longer than originally anticipated and so the plan to ride the train back to harlem was deaded and I was forced to cough up the $35 it took to catch a taxi. It was completely worth it though.

On Sunday I had this horrid dinner for Hilary Clinton to attend. You know, one of those fund-raising ones where you listen to speeches and they serve you cold chicken and cheap wine. Actually it wasn't that bad. I think I was more vexed by having to give up my Sunday night for this broad. I took my friend Rosie and she walked up and shook her hand and talked to her and everything. I wasn't interested. To tell you the truth I don't even know why I took the pic. She looks different in person too. For some reason Hilary just doesn't do it for me. I mean, I'd love to see a woman for president but she seems kind of dead behind the eyes. And listening to her speak sounds like word vomit. Just my opinion though. The cheap wine helped alot.

Dreading The Inevitable

This past weekend was one of relative ease and monolithic reflection. I know it sounds all deep and shit but the only thing that line means is I spent my entire weekend doing absolutely nothing and on top of that my cable was on the fritz for the better part of Saturday & Sunday so I had the opportunity to sit and meditate on many things. I know this probably doesn't serve as an adequate explanation for those of you I flaked out on (Sorry Sal & Chris & J & Spec) but alas this is my blog and if I can't be honest here then where the hell can I? Saturday was pretty much a wash as my intentions started out good with plans to go by Chris's barbecue in the park earlier in the day then in the evening shoot down to Sal's for a little R&R. Needless to say I never made it. In fact I never made it further than my living room couch or the kitchen rather. I guess if I wanted to blame anyone I'd blame Hanan since he came back with the best killer ever and well...we all know of that vicious cycle. Sunday I did, at least, do laundry which was much needed.

A couple of things that came to me during my monolithic reflection was that I seriously think one of my good friends is gay. I was having this conversation with a mutual friend of ours and the more I sat my sofa and contemplated the more sense I made of everything. I've always thought something wasn't right with him but my gaydar never went off until about a month a go. Something in the way he said "he's a bad boy" just didn't seem right and that's when I started looking at him through the corner of my eye. He didn't say it nearly strong enough to pull off the fact that he was calling another man "a bad boy". It all sounded very 'how you doin?' if you know what I mean. Then, what took the cake was that his girlfriend, who also happens to be a friend of mine said she believed he was too! Oh, you could've bought my ass for a dollar cause although I'd never tell her, she basically confirmed everything I had discussed just he day or two before. So after getting my Sherlock Holmes on I sat in deep thought about the whole situation. What do you do, as a friend, knowing your friend is hiding in that perverbial closet? Does this make him a down low brother? I can't stand they greedy asses either but still... I pretty much came up with "do nothing". Either that or I just fell asleep thinking about it. It was probably the latter but hey, it works for me.

So last night, I also got bullied into attending a fundraiser dinner for Hilary Clinton that's going on next Sunday. My boss pretty much said I absolutely must go. So now I've been roped into spending Sunday night with a bunch a folks I couldn't care less about. The ironic part is that I don't even plan on voting for Hilary. I'm giving my vote to Barack Obama yet my boss says he doesn't give a shit, he just needs ten people to sit at his table. Ahhhh, politics don't you love'em!

On another note, this morning while getting dressed for work I heard a small squeaking sound in my living room. I set glue traps late last week when I saw a mouse run against the wall behind my television. That fucked me up! I think I got his ass though but my ass was too chicken to look so I left my apartment knowing pretty much there's a damn mouse trapped in my living room. I couldn't stomach seeing that shit. It would've been with me all day. So instead I'm dreading the inevitable. I mean, at some point I've got to face him, right? I'll tell you though I'm not looking forward to it. At all.

Oddly enough, in many ways that situation is much like my romantic relationship with a certain individual. We haven't been on the best of terms here lately and I've been dancing around the fact that I just don't feel the same. The mouse glued to the trap signifies our relationship and the fact that I can't ignore it forever. I realized over the weekend at some point I've got to face it and break it off. I'm so over it but for some reason I'm reluctant to tell the cat to get lost. Why is it that we dread the inevitable even when its likely to be a good thing in the end?

Laughter & Mayhem

So Tuesday was one of those days where I was completely annoyed and agitated for the better part of the day. It wasn't until yesterday that I read that the sensible Taurus moon tensely squared the long-term opoosition between dreamy Neptune and realistic Saturn which may sound like gibberish to alot of yall but spelled trouble for me. When something like this occurs our days are marked by a series of delimas, which described my day perfectly on Tuesady. A series of delimas. Did you have a shitty day on Tuesday as well? Blame the planets. Listen to me. "Stars, moons quasars. Muthafuckas sounding like Elroy Jetson!" Yall remember that line from Boys In The Hood. Anyway, that was pretty much my attitude the entire day. I really just felt like cursing somebody out. Not for anything that anyone had done in particular. I wanted to do it just because I felt like it! My homie J said he felt the same way on Tuesday. I laughed when he told me he was "the angry black man" for the day. Hilarious. Fortunately, I woke up Wednesday feeling much better and pretty much had an effortlessly smooth day. I was even given another project. For my boss to be so much of an ass sometimes I must say it still feels good when he compliments me on my hard work. Even when a compliment comes in the form of more work for my ass.

My mood today is pretty relaxed. Every since Sal came back from Portugal and Puerto Rico I've been missing my beach action so I put up a picture of one of my favorite places in the entire world Buzios, Brasil!!!! I'll keep this picture indelibly printed on my brain throughout the day for a little peace of mind in all of this Mayhem. And just for the record I've never had a greater time visiting a foreign place than my time spent in Brasil. My ass has got to go back!

Here's a pic of Sal, looking dark as hell from his tramp across the globe this past month. I'm jealous but I'm also happy to see somebody's been living it up! In the end that's what its all about right? Who wants all work and no play. In this crazy world full of laughter and mayhem you have to make the time to actually step outside your self and bare witness to and partake in something that purely feels good and rejuvenates your mental, physical and spiritual self! Fuck the dumb shit yo. Hallelujah, Holla Back!

I Absolutely Adore Amy!!!!

Here's Amy singing Valerie, a cover of a track from the UK band The Zutons! Something about her beligerence and old soul strikes a cord with me. Enjoy!

Ain't Nothing Like Free Henny

Last night I checked out the Fader/Henny party with my homie J. It was hosted in the meatpacking district and as usual was full of drunkeness and hilarity. Ran into a couple old friends like Derrick who I haven't seen in ages and Brook who assigned me my first freelance writing gig when i first moved to New York. By 11:00 I'd had enough though so i got my drunk ass on the train and went home. It's funny sometimes the characters you run across here. Most harmless enough and some quite fucking hilarious. Met a dude who said he was getting kicked out of his apartment the next day in court and in the same breath asked me for my number. Interesting. And bold. Anyway, I'm paying for all the Henny now and my only thought is getting home and sitting on my couch doing absolutely nothing. I'm on the count down now with my trip to vegas and my subsequent trip home. At the very least it gives me something to look forward to...

J said this rooster was good luck so I'm posting up...shit i can use all the help I can get!

I Wish I Gave A Shit But I Don't

Sad but true. My boss completely spazzed out on me for the upteenth time and I had the most wonderful epiphany. I wasn't happy, I wasn't sad. I simply didn't give a shit! It was such a refreshing feeling of peace. I came back from lunch thirty minutes late and he almost had a heart attack. The way he came at me I thought maybe my ass embezzled some company funds in my sleep or something. I suppressed a weird "what the fuck" look and simply said "ok". "Don't get an attitude with me" he screamed. I wish I could get an attitude since maybe that would mean I actually gave a shit but alas... Do I like my job? Hell Yea! Will I subject myself to countless days of walking on egg shells and feeling bad about the little things that in the big scheme of things don't even register on my "Give-O-Shit" meter? Hell no! And I refuse to apologize for it. Why should I? I can handle my consequences and repercussions like the best of'em. I've become quite good at it actually and if I had it all to do over... well you get the picture.